3rd time...

Let me begin by saying thank you to everyone for the prayers and sweet messages you have sent us throughout this journey. Ya'll are amazing and we are very fortunate to have such wonderful family and friends.... The reason for starting this blog is to keep family and friends updated on our journey and for me to write out everything that is on my mind. If you know me very well, you know I keep things in and I am coming to realize that is not what I should do.. I need to talk about what is going on so I can move forward....
Well as most of you know, my husband and I started trying a few years back. Every month I would just get excited hoping this would be the month. Well it didn't happen so we went to my OBGYN. He guided us in the right direction and well we did 3 months of chlomid and it didn't work.. So we decided to see a fertility doctor. I never imagined that I would have to take the steps of going to see a fertility doctor. I was a nervous wreck on our first appointment. For about 2 months my Dr. examined me and did various test. Well, we found out that I do not ovulate normally. So we moved on to an IUI. An IUI is intrauterine insemination. We had our first IUI in January of 2011. I didn't know what to expect with it and it wasn't that bad. Well we found out later that month that it didn't work. I had an idea back in my head that it wouldn't but I couldn't help but keep my hopes up. We decided to give ourselves a break because literally when you are doing insemination you are on a calendar. We did IUI #2 in May. It was the day of field day at my school and I had to leave early. I was so excited and hoping and praying that this one would work. Well it got to be the end of the month and I had my yearly checkup at my OBGYN. Well they said the test was negative. I held back my tears and just wondered when would it be my turn. I had friends that were expecting and yes I was SOOOO very excited for them but jealous at the same time. Well the month of June went on and we went on a family vacation to Panama City. Before we left I was feeling tired and naucious throughout the days. I was going to take a test down there but decided not to because I just knew I wasn't. We came back home and went to eat with Ryan's mom to TGI Friday's. Well she had some sort of fish and the smell was HORRIBLE to me. Well Ryan and I went to Kroger across the street and he told me to just buy one and take it. Well I really had to use the restroom so I went into Kroger and did it :) Well it came out positive and I was just in SHOCK. I was thinking in my head I am almost 8 weeks pregnant and didn't even know. I came out of the bathroom and Ryan could tell from the look on my face. We were both VERY excited but in shock. Well I went and had bloodwork the next day and went to my fertility doctor and had a sonogram and got to hear the heartbeat. It was the most amazing thing to see my little peanut inside of my tummy. Yes, we called it our little peanut :) Well the next few days I slept a lot and was tired 24/7. It was time for vacation again and we went to New York. Everyone already knew except Ryan's parents. Ryan and I bought shirts that said here comes trouble and bun in the oven and wore them with his parents. They were so excited along with everyone else! We spend about 3 days in New York and come back to go to the Dr. Well I wasn't that tired anymore or feeling sick. I thought I was the lucky one who just got rid of it so fast. We were both sitting in the doctors office and I was so excited to have another sonogram. Well we get back there and see little peanut but do not hear anything. I just thought we woudln't hear the heartbeat today. They send us to another room and my Dr. comes in and says I am sorry but there was no heartbeat. I lost it and just could not get it together. I was just thinking that we have been through so much and then to have a miscarriage. My hubby and the Dr. were so supportive through this time and the Dr. knew that I would not remember anything he said. My emotions were just all over the place and I know many people have been through miscarriages. Well my Dr. could not do my D&C the next day so we had to wait 3 days until Monday. I was so nervous about that and telling everyone the news. We came up with so many creative ways to tell everyone and then I would have to tell them about the miscarriage. Well I had to go through Pre Op and get all of my instructions for the D&C. Then, we had to leave the hospital and go get my prescriptions. All I could think was I just want to go home and soak in what I was just told. We finally made it home and Ryan and I both thought maybe it would be a good idea to go hang out with friends. Well, we went and I lost it at the restaurant and we went home... The day finally came for the D&C and boy was that a procedure. The doctors and nurses treated me so nice that day. I had to relax for a few weeks and let my body heal.... School started back and it was nice because it got my minds off things. Honestly though everyday I think about my miscarriage, but at the same time I am happy because I know I can get pregnant. I just went in for my follow up a few days ago and my doctor recommended different fertility doctors to me. Yes we are going to change doctors just because of personal reasons... Well we both decided we are going to try a doctor in Lexington, SC. Our first appointment is on Sept 2(Saturday). Please keep us in your prayers throughout another journey of fertility. I am very hopeful that it will work and know one day I will have a sweet baby boy or girl :) Thank you again for all of the prayers and sweet messages. Our family and friends are so important to us and the support is WONDERFUL!!!